MARRIAGE FRESH

                        THE 3 “Ts"  TO KEEP YOUR MARRIAGE FRESH
      We try to keep our marriage fresh in the following ways.

      We TALK. Shortly after we were first married, we both woke up at
about 2:00 A.M. wide awake. That night, we watched an old film on TV.
Although the movie wasn't bad, we decided that we could spend our times in
a more profitable venture--talking.  And we have. About once a month, we
have those unplanned 2:00 A.M. to 4:00 A.M. discussions. And we work hard
at talking at more normal times as well. At least four times a day we talk
on the phone and check in briefly. We think we are getting better at this
with age. The more we talk, the better we are at it.

      We THINK. One way we have maintained a closeness is that we think
about common issues. When one of us is struggling with an issue related to
work, we think about it together. When we are wrestling with an issue
about home or kids or relationships, we think together. We value each
other's minds. We don't separate roles or responsibilities in such a way
that we are out of touch with one another. We want to be partners in all we
do, and this thinking process not only makes us more effective, it also
makes us feel better.

       We TRY. Oh, how we try. We try to pray together and fail more than
we succeed. We try to get date nights each week only to find a date night
taken by a kid's ball game. We try to read the Bible together as a family
and it's a hit and miss. We try to keep in touch with friends because we
know that a network of those who care helps. When depression is only an
inch away, we try to have "picnics in the storms" instead of giving in to
discouragement. On most days, we give it our best efforts. We have tried so
much that we understand that perfection will only occur in heaven. So we
don't give up and that process makes our marriages stronger.

-- Denny and Marilyn Rydberg