LETTING GO

                      "WHY DO BEGINNINGS HAVE AN END?"
       Why do beginnings have an end?  Why do we have to meet only to lose
in the end?
       These are questions left unanswered, word left unsaid, letters left
unread, poems left undone, songs left unsung, love left unexpressed,
promises left unfulfilled.  In a relationship, one of the hardest things to
do is saying goodbye and letting go.  It's as hard as breaking a crystal
because you'll never know when you'll be able to pick up the pieces
again.  More often than not, they who go feel not the pain of parting; it
is they who stay behind that suffer, because they are left with memories of
love that was meant to be a love that was.
        At the beginning and at the end of a relationship, we are
embarrassed to find ourselves alone.  Unfair as it may seem, but that's the
drama, the bittersweet and the risk of falling in love. After all nothing
is constant but change.  Everything will eventually come to its end without
us knowing when, without us even knowing why, and we must forget, not because
we want to but because we have to.
       In letting go, sorrows come not as single spy but in battalion.  It
seems that everywhere you go, everything you do, every song you hear, every
turn of your head, every move of your body, every beat of your heart, every
blink of your eye and every breath you take always remind you of him.  It's
like a stab of a knife, a torture in the night.  Funny how the whole world
becomes depopulated when only one person is missing.  Just imagine there
are four billion people on earth and yet it seems you feel lonely and empty
without the other.
       I don't know if it's worth calling an art, but letting go entails
special skills sparkled with a considerable space and time.  Time heals
wounds but it takes push on our part.  Acceptance plays a part.  Not all
wishes come true.  Not all love stories end with "happily ever after."
      We hate to suffer if it would mean happiness to others.  We have to
cry to temporarily let go of the pain. Every beginning has its end like
every dawn has its dusk.  It's something we can't control, something we
have to live up with.
      It's over, he's gone.  But life has to go on. Goodbye doesn't always
mean forever.
      There will always be a place and time where questions will be
answered, words will be spoken, letters will be read, poems will be recited
in the night, songs will be sung in harmony, love will be expressed in
solitude and promises will be fulfilled. Somewhere, somehow, someday.

    * DEAR LORD, I bring my bleeding heart before You.  I feel so empty and
alone.  And my strength ebbs to near nothing. I don't know how you'll work
in my life but I trust you.  And so I ask for Your healing presence,
Lord.  Let me pour out all my hurts and pains to you.  Others may sometimes
get tired of me but I know that you'll always listen, understand and
care.  Give me the strength to go on, to move forward each day.  By Your
grace I know I'd be able to let go of my hurts and disappointments, not in
my time but in Your time. So thank You, Lord, for Your healing
presence.  Thank You for Your love that sustains me.  And thank You for
being here now... understanding and comforting me.